i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
