he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
