Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
