We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
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