Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Randomize
