I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
