worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Randomize