windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
