My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
