It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
