yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
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