I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
how can u be prego again
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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