i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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