my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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