Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
