did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
