I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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