You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Randomize
