We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Green mimosas i think yes
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
