this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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