is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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