just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
i drank out of a bidet.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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