This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Randomize