You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
