I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
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