So drunk its hurt
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize