We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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