That's when you crack a 10am beer
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
