i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
i came on her dog
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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