im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize
