i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
