Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Nicole vs. Life
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize