I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Holy shit dude........stairs
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
