my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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