Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
...so i touched it.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Randomize
