Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
