escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
I just had sex on a roof
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
