I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Randomize