I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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