Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize
