There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
