pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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