Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
