it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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