normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
