Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
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