too bad you live with your parents still
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
