White coat. Heels.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
