break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
