Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
