you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
my being single is dangerous.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
I look excited, but its just a facade.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
