At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
I wish i was in the wii world.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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