bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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