evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
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